Our Sacred and Holy Family

  You have all heard me say, on more than one occasion, that our family is “sacred and holy.”  It is to be treated with the highest esteem and among the greatest gifts bestowed on us.  This is where God most obviously reveals himself and makes his intimate love known.  One way He reveals Himself is through the workings of our body.  It is clearly seen in the circulatory system.  You all are connected and very much a part of your father and I.  Physically, our blood pulses through your veins.   Because you each have a mixture of our blood running through you, you are equally a part of one another through this genetic fact.  Though when one is hurting, why do we cry for each other?  Why do we feel such joy for one another?  Why do we go to great lengths to protect each other?  

  This observation reaches beyond science and spills into faith. This close bond is developed and deepened through love, sacrifice and forgiveness.  Does this sound familiar to you?  This physical truth points directly to our Lord and His mission on earth.  He came to show us how to love, sacrifice and forgive so that we might “get along” and know God’s will for us. He came to change “ethos”(conformity to law) into “eros”(conversion of the heart-love). He taught us how to be a blessing to one another. He came to seal His love with a blood covenant.  Isn't it interesting that our circulatory system keeps the heart pumping?

In order to keep this family heart pumping properly, we must take care of it in a special way.  The family must have the holy “spirit” within it.  If "home is where the heart is," the family home must be a place where all members can feel comfortable and safe being who they are, quirks and all.  It is a safe place to do all the learning necessary for living outside the family unit.  Living together is difficult and requires a lot of sacrifices, even if they are many small ones.  When you disagree, you must approach each other with this holy spirit.  You must never tear each other down and you must do all you can to lift each other up.  You must be honest with yourself and with others in the family...but never brutal with your honesty.  You must know that your words are as powerful as your actions. They can lift a spirit to heavenly heights or they can crush a soul with just one word.  “Thou shall not kill” also applies to the spirit.  You know I am voracious when I see this mean spirit and warn against the dangers of letting it inside the family.  We are obligated by God to show kindness and respect toward one another if we want His love to be present in our lives.  We must preserve and nourish this spirit with words of encouragement and gentle words of criticism. 

In marriage, if you tear down your spouse with words or deeds (because you are made one in the sacramental marriage) you will also be tearing yourself apart.  You will be tearing your children apart as well.  You cannot attack one member of your family without adversely effecting yourself or the family as a whole.  It is impossible. 

If I do my job well, you will enjoy each other’s company as adults and will be able to laugh at the times you disagreed.  There will be no grudges.  There will be no unresolved hurt keeping you from being close.  I will be able to leave this world with the full confidence that you will stand shoulder to shoulder, helping each other through any difficult time.  You will always have 9 friends who laugh at your bad jokes.  People will know you love each other by the words you speak and the by the bond they can feel. I hope and pray you all see the power of your words and use them with great care.

My favorite part of motherhood is watching you all interact together, especially when you are laughing and having fun.  I can easily imagine the kingdom of heaven when I experience this joy.  Thank you all for this joy.

Love,

MOM